funny quotes backgrounds

You know you live in Phoenix when the cold-water faucet is hotter than the hot-water faucet. ~Author Unknown



Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. ~Fight Club movie, screenplay by Jim Uhls, directed by David Fincher, novel by Chuck Palahniuk



The problem with hatred and violence is that they intensity the fears of the white majority, and leave them less ashamed of their prejudices toward Negroes. ~Martin Luther King, Jr., Where Do We Go from Here: Chaos or Community?, 1967



Democracy is two wolves and a lamb deciding what to have for dinner. Liberty is a well-armed lamb. ~Benjamin Franklin



As a graduate of the Zsa Zsa Gabor School of Creative mathematics, I honestly do not know how old I am. ~Erma Bombeck



Racism is man's gravest threat to man - the maximum of hatred for a minimum of reason. ~Abraham Joshua Heschel Racism is man's gravest threat to man - the maximum of hatred for a minimum of reason. ~Abraham Joshua Heschel



Coffee in styrofoam is against my religion. ~Betsy Canas Garmon, www.wildthymecreative.com



Gratitude is the sign of noble souls. ~Aesop



We borrowed golf from Scotland as we borrowed whiskey. Not because it is Scottish, but because it is good. ~Horace Hutchinson



The last I heard from my destiny, it wanted me to make a legal U-Turn at my next opportunity. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com



Good company upon the road is the shortest cut. ~Author Unknown



Ods me I marle what pleasure or felicity they have in taking their roguish tobacco. It is good for nothing but to choke a man, and fill him full of smoke and embers. ~Ben Jonson, Every Man in His Humour



Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupery



Families are like fudge - mostly sweet with a few nuts. ~Author Unknown



Seagulls... slim yachts of the element. ~Robinson Jeffers



Malice drinks one-half of its own poison. ~Seneca



It is the lash of hunger which compels the poor man to submit. In order to live he must sell - "voluntarily" sell - himself every day and hour to the "beast of property." ~Johann Most, The Beast of Property



It was a book to kill time for those who like it better dead. ~Rose Macaulay



The quickest way for a parent to get a child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable. ~Lane Olinghouse



A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. ~Josh Billings